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I'll Be Yo Ho Fo XXXmas

by Wendy Ho

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1.
I’m turning some tricks on December 25th In a manger or in a chimney And although I know, I shouldn’t charge on Christmas You need to pay my fee I'll be Yo Ho for Christmas (dat’s right) You can come on me (not in the eye! Not in the eye!) Please pay cash, and yes its extra fo my ass Satisfaction I guaranmuthfuckin tee I will lick yo butthole (dat’s 100 dollas for a rimjob) Till it shines and gleams I’ll be Yo Ho for Christmas If only in yo dreams But it doesn’t have to be a dream, honey It can be a reality right here, right now We can go behind that dumpster over dare in the parkin lot 50 for a hand, 100 for a suck or a rim, not boaf dats EACH, OKAY…150 for a fuck, 200 up da butts But if you payin 150 for my vajay Please don’t be trynna put it in my butt and pretend that you aimin for My vagina…you know da difference between a butthole and a vagina you can tell, you can tell da difference between my butthole and my vajayjay one is tight and needs spit and one is creamy and dreamy okay? Shit is dry in wintra I need Lots a lube and vaselines I’ll be yo ho fo Christmas If only in yo dreams Merry Christmas, everybody!
2.
Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Check yo list and check it twice there’s a ho who been naughty, naughty and nice Pack up yo bag getcho fat ass in da sleigh, I want loot like I won the lotteray You was the one that I gave thanksta on turkey day, don’t make me get gangsta Left you some cookies and some similac, on my knees so you can empty yo sac Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Christmas morning ran to the tree o tannebaum on top of my TV Where’s my presents? Where my gifts? Thought to myself—SANTA YOU BULLSHIT! I KNOW I’M A HO AND I STOLE A FEW PURSES The verses I spit contain a few curses Still got heart and my Christmas wish is Golden grill and a new set of dishes! Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Away in a ghetto no money for gifts I wrote to the North Pole SANTA GIMME MY SHIT You skipped my house last year I cried till I bled You do it again I’m gonna shootchoo in da head I’m gonna shootchoo in da balls I’m gonna deck da halls with balls of Santa falalalala Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Where my shit, santa? Where my shit, santa? Ho ho ho Where my clit, santa? Where my clit, santa? Ho ho ho Work my clit, santa? Work my clit, santa? Work my clit, santa! Ho ho ho

credits

released December 13, 2011

Produced by: Craig Levy at Little Pioneer Studio in Brooklyn, NY

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Wendy Ho Los Angeles, California

Ho is an artist.  Ho is a state of mind.  Ho redefines women in music with true liberation.  She is funny and sexy.  A self- possessed, self-assured mashup of street and trash who makes you laugh while she makes you think.  The responses she evokes from audiences are as diverse as her roots, but at the core there is no question about who she is.  Wendy is all woman.  All Ho. ... more

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